I love a good joke. Who doesn’t, right? I have searched the web for quality and funny fishing jokes. Some are pretty corny. There are a few Dad Jokes (which Fish Face Goods is somewhat famous for). They are all clean (but that doesn’t mean I don’t like a good dirty joke). Below are some of the best fishing jokes that I have found to date. If you have another one, please leave it in the comments for all to share.

Why is fishing such good business? The net profits.

What do you call a fish that practices medicine? A Sturgeon.

The Drunken Ice Fisherman

A Canadian angler had a few too many to drink and decided to go ice fishing. He grabbed his gear, stepped out onto the ice, and started to cut a hole when he heard a booming voice shout:

“There are no fish under the ice!”

The man jumped up and looked around, but he didn’t see anyone. He carried on cutting into the ice, and again, the voice boomed:

”There are no fish under the ice!”

Still nobody. Was he going mad? The man stumbled to a new spot and started drilling another hole when the voice shouted for a third time:

”There are no fish under the ice!”

The man looked up into the blinding light and said ”Is that you, God?”

The voice answered, ”No, it’s the manager of the ice rink!”

What sort of music should you listen to while fishing? Something catchy.

Why don’t fish play soccer? They’re afraid of the net.

A Quality Lure

Bob’s walking down the street when he sees a kid sitting on his front porch jigging in a bucket. As he reaches the kid, Bob stops for a better look. The bucket’s empty. He asks the kid, “What are you fishing for, son?” The kid looks up and says with a shrug, “Suckers mainly.” Bob smiles and asks, “Caught any yet?” “Yep,” the kid replies. “You’re the tenth.”

What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.

What’s the fastest fish in the lake? A motor-Pike.

Biggest Liar

The fishing season hasn’t opened yet, and a fisherman who doesn’t even have a license is casting for trout as a stranger approaches and asks, “Any luck?” “Any luck? Heck yes, this is a wonderful spot. I took 10 out of this stream yesterday,” he boasts. “Is that so? By the way, do you know who I am?” asks the stranger. “Nope.” “Well, meet the new game warden.” “Oh,” gulped the fisherman. “Well, do you know who I am?” “Nope,” said the game warden. “Meet the biggest liar in the state.”

What did the trout say when it swam into a wall? Dam!

Why do fish swim in schools? Because they can’t walk.

Married for 30 Years

One day, two guys Frank and Bob were out fishing. A funeral service passes over the bridge they’re fishing by, and Bob takes off his hat and puts it over his heart. He does this until the funeral service passes by. Frank then said, “Gee Bob, I didn’t know you had it in you!” Bob then replies, “It’s the least I could do. After all, I was married to her for 30 years.”

What do you call a fish that won’t shut up? A Largemouth.

What’s the difference between a fish and a piano? You can tune a piano, but you can’t tuna fish.

Floridians Up North

Two Floridian anglers were out ice fishing during a trip up north. They’d been at it for hours and hadn’t caught a thing.  “I don’t know what we’re doing wrong,” said the first man. Just then, a local passed on a snowmobile with a whole bucket of fish on the back. The second man turns to the first and says, “That’s why we’re not catching anything, we’re not trolling!”